I wonder how I built up so much hatred all these years. The people, the work, and the society make me sick at some point in time. Then it goes away, and sick again. Maybe I need love, true love to feel alive again. That genuine feeling of emotional sensation that I have almost forgotten. They say I lack empathy. Ooohhhh believe me! I have poured out so much empathy I could give 'till there's nothing left of me. And those people tossed it off in the air like it was nothing.
Sometimes I miss my old self, the one who can get scared of just about anything. The one who couldn't speak out for herself and is often neglected. I miss that side of me because at the very least - I was feeling something. I feel like I can empathize with the world for all its cruelness and imperfection. But now I know I lost that emotional side of me, I wonder why. Maybe I just need to love more than hate. And keep in touch with the people important to me.
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